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Marhaba (Translated in English = Welcome) |
This Page Is Dedicated To Non-Muslims Who Wish To Know More About Islam
My Story to Islam - by Abdul Rahmaan
I wish I had a dramatic story to tell, such as I woke up with tubes sticking out of me on a life support machine and suddenly realized I needed to search for God.
The truth is I was never a Christian or religious in any way nor was i looking for god. I didnt even feel the need to search, in the end I felt as if it was Islam that found me. Of course id agree that when faced with death directly, i dont care who you are.. We all turn to God.
So anyway this is my story.....
My background
I moved out from the house that i was raised in at the age of 19, already at this point i was mixed up in drugs, drinking alcohol, chasing women and much more. I was the host...the party was always at my place which was part of the reason i had to move out. My mom had always trusted me, so while she was always out round her fiancs house, i was left in charge of the house. I suppose i abused that trust and put my friends before my family especially my younger brother and sister. To the dismay of my neighbors and my teenage brother & sister we had wild parties in the early hours of the mornings. I regret this now deeply because of the impact i feel it has had on my brother and sister. Even though i dont like to judge them, my sister has a 5 year old son with compulsive weed smoker (although id admit he shouldnt shoulder the blame, she is accountable for her own choices), and although i get on with them fine, i still cant help but wonder the influence i may have had on her selection in men.
My brother has two boys aged 6 and 2 with a woman that has four children from 3 different fathers one of which used to be his best friend. He has been in prison twice, the first of which involved making great efforts to reform his own self slowly preparing for the day he would see his expecting girlfriend when released only to discover the earth shattering news that he wasnt the father of the new born. In fact it was his best friend who was the father; needless to say, he had been up to no good while my brother was behind bars. I will spare you the details of the circumstances of his stint in prison, because this girl, now his wife was at the center of this also. Again i cant help but wonder looking back the impact i had in all this as the role model during these crucial years. Its a shame but he is now heavily involved with a politic party called the EDL and travels with them up and down the country on their anti-Islam meetings & rallys
Being my own Boss
As i say i was the host, and so now moving into my own place i had more freedom to do whatever i wanted. The drugs became stronger, the women became easier, gambling became more frequent and the parties became more intense. In fact they got out of control; looking back i think i am the only one that has survived with their mental faculties intact. It got to the point where i couldnt stop what was happening, the party would go on with, or without me...even in my own flat.
Whether it was a police raid, the kitchen on fire, a random girls head being shaved, the living room of my 10th floor flat window being smashed or someone getting into a fight it was all getting way out of hand. This wasnt me, I was in too deep, and I longed for a way out. By this stage I had almost stopped all drugs and alcohol etc. I would just reflect with a sober mind upon the situation around me. The situation i found myself in was disgusting.
What is Islam?
But Alhamdulillah there was one shining light, a friend that used to live in the same street as me before i moved from my family home remained in contact. He would visit me often; a lot of the boys perhaps didnt have the patience to listen to him preaching about Islam, especially during this time around 2003-2004. We would always be up early hours of the morning with BBC news 24 on in the background and my friend would be explaining how the news is manipulating the situation etc. It was difficult because my Yemenis friend was not the best English speaker and would need my assistance at times to summarize the point he was making. In the context of a group it is difficult to speak about such sensitive issues but he was a likeable character and although many times he couldnt retain the groups attention i would help him explain and clarify the many things he said. Slowly but surely many of the things he said rubbed off on me and i acted as a link between him and the group. One thing that always struck me was how positive & assured he always was. Although i was mixed up in this life style i always raised with manners & to give someone my attention when they were speaking to me. And so i absorbed the Islamic point of view, I remember always having questions of my own, i became interested in challenging & finding a weakness in this religion but there seemed to be a logical answer for everything i asked, even if i didnt agree with it at the time.
My Yemenis friend was the first person to give me a copy of Al-Quran, i dont know why but i felt quite surprised he gave it me. I read a few chapters and quickly realized that this wasnt a story structured in the way I had become accustomed to. It was very commanding, which didnt turn me away because after all God is the one who commands. Although there were parts i didnt fully understand, i must say it was quite clear. I thought that if i ever did decide to become religious then this would be the best religion to follow. But i was under the assumption that all books were from man. It wasnt until i found out that this Qur'an claimed to be the complete word of god without even a trace of mans influence that my interest Islam intensified. I was utterly amazed that anyone could make such a bold statement. No other religion can honestly make this claim, yet Muslims are saying this. The only one that could make this statement is almighty god himself and so i gave the Quran the proper attention it deserved.
Wanting to know more about Islam
Lo and behold i came into contact with a very good friend of mine from school, i had known since 11. I felt sad that we had lost touch but really happy that we had bumped into each other again. He not only provided me with comparative religious material such as Ahmed Deedat, Zaik Niak etc but also material on the events of September 11th 2001.
All these things were beginning to cement my belief that this Adam(as) and Eve(as) story is true after all and that the Quran's version is not contaminated with falsehood like the other books. So after months of trying to prove an error in al-Quran i finally said to myself what i had been resisting 'this is the truth'.
If the truth be told i felt devastated because i knew i had to act upon it, i also knew in 2006 at the age of 22 i wasnt quite ready to submit just yet. I made a promise that one day i would become a Muslim, at heart i was a Muslim.
Knowing where to find the Path but not wanting to walk it
And so, I chased the Dunya week after week, month after month & year after year. I never admitted to my friend that i was a Muslim, but i agreed with everything he said. I think he knew i was a Muslim, its just knowing the path and walking the path are two different things, and i think he could relate to that as he had a checkered past also.
Its sad because i tried to justify my reasons for gambling with outrageous plans of giving a certain percentages to charity, justifying my way around marriage before sex and all these things to suit myself. I would debate with others defending Islam, explaining Islam to friends and family but in the end, how could they ever take me seriously when i myself was not practicing what i was preaching?
Every time i would wake up with a hangover, or perhaps a black eye from a wild drunken night out, or wonder why i have no money left, I would reflect on why these things are happening. I knew why, but still i carried on. Shame on me.
Its time to grow up
It wasnt until the spring of 2009 when i got made redundant that i had more time on my hands. At first this time involved blowing all my money on drinking, gambling and going to music festivals, concerts etc. Eventually i started to use my time to look into Islam more and more and find out what is going on in the world instead of selfishly just indulging in my own well-being etc.
By October of that year I felt something inside of me drawing me closer to Allah (swt). I knew I needed to finally submit to creator of the heavens and the earth and become a Muslim soon. I couldnt put it off any longer. During this time i had found the friend I had lost contact with yet again via internet (the one i had known from school since we were 11). We met up quite regular and in December of that year around 3 days before Christmas he asked me if i wanted to take my Shahadah. Even so, i was taken back. I had already planned to meet my family and do all the things that we do on Christmas day etc. Then there's my friend asking me to come to the mosque a do my Shahadah on this day. Well of course i said yes, Alhamdulillah. There was a program in which sheikh Muhammad al-Yaqoubi from Damascus was talking about the 99 beautiful names of Allah.
Choosing to act on truth & wanting to build a relationship with the one who created me
On this Friday i declared in front of 2-3 thousand Muslims:
Ash hadu al-la ilaha il-lal lahu
wa ash hadu an-na Muhammadan
'ab-duhu wa rasuluh
and was given the name 'Abdul Rahmaan by the great sheikh.
So yeah it was a gradual submission. But i could never go back, i got sick of the dunyah its far less tempting for me. Its been 16 month now and i am happy in my life, i enjoy working for a charity called 'Islamic Help' and have been treated very well by my brothers in Islam, the Pakistan community especially.
What can i say......Allah has made it easy for me.
By Abdul-Rahmaan Tobin
Any questions or support you may need please dont hesitate to contact me and I will try my very best to help whatever the circumstances abdulrahmaan@islamichelp.org.uk
Useful links -
Source of all Knowledge
http://quran.com
An introduction on how to pray
http://www.islamcan.com/salat/duas/index.shtml
Stories of the Prophets (pbuh)
http://www.dhikrullah.com/knowledge/books/imaan/Stories%20Of%20The%20Prophets%20By%20Ibn%20Kathir.pdf |
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Daily Prayer Times
21 Dec 2024 12:08
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Start |
Jamat |
| Fajar |
06:34 |
07:30 |
| Zuhar |
12:10 |
13:00 |
| Asar |
14:08 |
14:45 |
| Maghrib |
15:56 |
15:59 |
| Isha |
17:38 |
18:35 |
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On the authority of Abu Harayrah (may Allah be
pleased with him) from the Prophet (PBUH), who said: Allah (mighty and
sublime be He) said:
"Spend on charity, O son of Adam, and I
shall spend on you". – (Al-Bukhari also by Muslim)
______________________
Whoever is kind, Allah will be kind to him;
therefore be kind to man on the earth. He who is in heaven will show mercy on
you. - (Abu Dawud: Tirmidhi)
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Surah Al-Tawba
The mosques of Allah shall be visited and
maintained by such as believe in Allah and the Last Day, establish regular
prayers, and practice regular charity, and fear none (at all) except Allah.
It is they who are expected to be on true guidance. (18)
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